Disclaimer:
This article discusses suicide and related social issues in a preventive, critical, and public-interest context. It does not describe methods, encourage self-harm, or justify violence against children.
The intent is to promote awareness, responsible discussion, and child protection, not to target or stigmatise any gender, individual, or community. If you or someone you know is experiencing emotional distress or suicidal thoughts, please seek professional help or contact a suicide prevention helpline immediately.https://unbiasedpollkhol.com
Every suicide is tragic. But when children are dragged into an adult’s decision to die, it crosses a line that society must stop tip-toeing around.
In recent years, news reports from across India have repeatedly shown a disturbing pattern: a woman dies by suicide along with her children, or kills them before attempting to end her own life. Often, the trigger mentioned is an argument sometimes serious, sometimes shockingly ordinary.
- A fight with a husband?
- A family dispute?
- Financial stress?
- Being stopped from consuming gutkha or alcohol, really?
None of this is new to family life. What is new and deeply alarming is how easily children are being pulled into irreversible acts meant to resolve temporary adult conflicts.
This article is not about blaming women.
It is about protecting children.
And about refusing to normalise something that should never be normal.
When Everyday Arguments Become Permanent Graves
Millions of couples argue every day in India. About money, habits, in-laws, suspicion, control, anger. Almost none of those arguments end with children dying.
So, what’s the real issue?
When a disagreement over something as small as gutkha consumption ends with children being poisoned, hanged, or pushed in front of trains, the issue is no longer “marital conflict.”
It is a failure to recognise that children are separate human beings, not emotional extensions of adults.
“If I Can’t Live, They Shouldn’t Either” A Dangerous Belief
One pattern quietly runs through many such cases even when it is not said aloud:
“My children cannot survive without me.”
“I am saving them from future suffering.”
“What will happen to them anyway?”
This is not love.
This is distorted thinking under extreme emotional stress.
Children are not POSSESSIONS.
They are not proof of SACRIFICE.
They are not tools to communicate PAIN, ANGER, or REVENGE.
A parent’s suffering however real does not grant moral ownership over a child’s life.
“According to the Supreme Court, ‘No’ means ‘No’—it is the end.”
Then, why do we not take children’s ‘no’ as seriously as an adult’s?”
When Children Become Emotional Weapons
In some cases, suicide with children begins to resemble something even more unsettling: a final message to those left behind.
- A spouse must live with the guilt forever.
- A family must carry the blame.
- Society must remember the “tragedy.”
In this framing, children become collateral damage in an adult power struggle a way to ensure maximum emotional impact after death.
This is where sympathy must stop short of justification.
Pain explains suffering.
It does not excuse killing.
Why This Cannot Become a “Narrative”?
The greatest danger is silence or worse, romanticisation.
Phrases like:
- “She had no choice”
- “She couldn’t leave them behind”
- “They died together”
These soften what should remain stark.
There is no dignity in children dying to resolve adult despair.
There is no poetry in family suicide.
There is only loss and a preventable one.
When media, society, or social media comment sections blur this line, they risk turning tragedy into a template. And templates become trends.
What Needs to Change Immediately? Mental Health, Accountability, and Child Protection.
- Clear public messaging
Children’s lives are non-negotiable. No circumstance justifies their death. - Mental health intervention at the family level
Not after tragedy before it. - Cooling-off systems
Crisis helplines, local mediation, community intervention that interrupts impulsive decisions. - Responsible media reporting
No detailed methods. No romantic framing. No implied justification. - Social courage to say the hard thing
That love does not kill. And despair does not grant permission.
A Line Society Must Draw
Suicide is personal.
Killing children is NOT.
A woman’s pain deserves empathy.
A child’s life deserves protection WITHOUT CONDITIONS.
If we truly care about mental health, we must stop confusing understanding with endorsement, and sympathy with silence.
Children are not exit plans.
They are not apologies.
They are not messages.
They are lives.
And society must protect them even when the truth is uncomfortable.
3 Feb 2026, Written by Poonam Mehta
Everyone needs to understand this, mothers actually behave in selfish manner with kids, stop them being independent and then later cry for their love when they grow up and look for their separate life. Children are neither tool nor things where you can take out anger.
Kudos to the writer, very well written
Many men/father’s are afraid to file child custody or visitation because they know his ex wife’s tendency, many women openly challenges father if ever he try to approach/ meet children she will commit suicide along children, most women use children as a blackmailing, bargaining tool, that leaves men with no option as laws are biased towards them.
I totally agree on these points. Children are vulnerable when they are with such monthers. And even child support helplines don’t help